Cheyla McCormack

Cheyla McCormack

USA

One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do, sang the ’70s rock band Three Dog Night. The one woman in three around the world who will be raped, beaten, coerced into sex, or otherwise abused in her lifetime knows that “one” is also the deadliest number that you’ll ever know.

My mother became “one” when my father would grab her hair to force her to face him, giving him a clear shot at pummeling and slapping her face. One day, to stop him, she picked up the scissors and chopped off the beautiful, black, Tahitian hair that fell below her waist and was her crowning glory.

My mother should not have had to make this choice. Her story shaped the work I would do over the next two decades. It was a journey of despair, great promise, nightmare images, and stories of women around the world who are suffering physical and emotional trauma because they had the unfortunate fate to be born a woman. Small stories of a woman’s triumph in escaping her abuser, justice that leads to healing, women who “lift as they climb,” contributed to and inspired my body of work.

My journey came to a stop quite suddenly and I changed course when I received a diagnosis of stage one endometrial cancer in 2003. I had to take stock of my life. Was I finished with VAW (violence against women) work? What was missing in the anti-VAW movement? What empty niche could I fill that would push the stagnant efforts forward?

Evelyn Brom, who worked with me at Seattle Rape Relief and on several projects since then, and I put our heads together and created a new organization, One in Three Women, based on UNIFEM’s 2003 report “Not a Minute More.”

One in Three was formed by our desire to write a “new story “of a powerful cultural shift, the creation of a system of influence that brings about a world where women and children can live and thrive without violence and abuse. The “old story” that many organizations embrace rewards top-down leadership styles, independence, competition, and territorialism. It maintains and separates spheres of influence: information, creativity, wisdom, intelligence, and real community. The “new story” we are telling and writing emphasizes: kindred spirits, interconnectedness, collective consciousness, listening, responding, humanity, compassion, spirit, passion, and transforming leadership.

We believe we have to be vigilant and self-critical. We need allies who will push to reform systems that maintain or perpetuate gender inequality, one of the root causes of VAW. Women around the world suffer ongoing violence every day and our countries’ leaders are not doing enough to stop it. With the help of our leaders we can create a global violence against women framework of action, a social engagement plan so that someday “one” becomes “none.”