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“Heik E7na” (We Are Like This): Some Sketches from My Society

17 September 2012 2 Comments

"The Beauty" by Samar Ghattas

Dima Saleh
Ramallah, Palestine

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Who is the Real Babbler?!

A man in the cafe shop was telling his friend: “Women are the source of disasters…They are babblers…They have nothing but a tongue!”

While he was talking he saw a girl, so his conversation is paused so he can  turn to her and say, “Hey beautiful! What a sexy body you have! I am sure that you are going to meet your boyfriend soon!”

He turns back to his friend: “Oh I didn’t tell you? My friend caught his sister while she was walking with her boyfriend and…blah blah blah.”

A Tour

It’s the traditional process leading to marriage; the man who wants to get married takes a tour in every girl’s house—every girl who is in the marriage age range, until he finds his bride.

The girl’s preferred specifications:

“Blonde, very tall, her age should be around 18 and it’s better if she has a Bachelor’s degree!”

So, from where can we bring this miracle woman?

“Men are Qawwamun” (cultural interpretation: superior, actual definition: to protect and maintain or take care of)

I find it ridiculous for a man who does not follow Islamic ethics to simultaneously insist that his wife should wear the veil to satisfy society. He faces a social pressure to do so—to avoid being perceived as a ‘spineless’ man who cannot control his wife.

This man’s wife may be in the workforce and contributing her fair share to household expenses. But when a decision needs to be made, he will tell her, “Men are Qawwamun!”

Dude, you should think about the real meaning of the verse and its explanations by the Islamic scholars!

To be a qawwam over something or someone means to guard, maintain, or take care of that something or someone in a proper and fair manner. It does not mean you are superior.

Violence Begets Violence

While she was drinking her coffee in the morning with her husband, they disagreed about something. The disagreement ended when he slapped her. Later she went to the school where she is working as a teacher, and in the class she felt annoyed by a brat…so she slapped her!

Women’s Rights Defender

A guy is chatting with his girlfriend on the phone and telling her: “I am one of the men who support women’s rights…Women should study, work, travel and obtain their freedom…Wait. Wait a minute honey.” He put his hand on the phone and started to shout at his sister: “Close your window or I will come to break your neck!”

New Scientific Discovery

A doctor was giving a lecture about child marriage, so he said: “Early marriage is not good…but if as a doctor I see that if the girl who is 14 years old has an overweight body, then she should get married because I am afraid that she will become more overweight and will never find someone to marry her… so marriage could depend on the size not the age…”

"The Curious" by Samar Ghattas

Al-Fatiha (The Opening) Two Times

After he read the opening chapter of the Quran over his wife’s grave, he wiped his tears and hugged his father in law, saying: “May she rest in peace, I don’t know what I can do for my orphaned children! They will suffer without their mum! I think that nobody will be more kind to them than their aunt… What do you think?”

Father in law: “As you like, it’s a pleasure for me to give you my daughter.”

While they were shaking hands, the widow said with joy: “Then the wedding will be after 40 days” … and they read the opening again for the new occasion!

It is a Snare of You Women إن كيدكن عظيم

She lived with her husband and supported him through bad times.  She worked with him and contributed to payment of life’s expenses, even helped pay for a part of the house, despite the fact that he officially owned the house (because he is a man and the house should be in his name).

Fifteen years later, they got divorced, and here is the dilemma. The house is in his name. Therefore the woman lost the house…

Always our society insists to use the Verse 28 from Surat Yousef in the Quran: “It is a snare of you women” as a proof that women are malicious. Actually this verse does not refer to all women in the world, but rather it refers to the specific women at a specific point in time who ensnared the prophet Yousef (Peace Be Upon Him).

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Other articles by Dima Saleh:

Butterfly without Fins: A Novel from Palestine

Pardon Me, My Daughter, Who Is Your Guardian?

Dima’s Blog (in Arabic)

Follow the Connection Point initiative on Twitter (@Connection_Pt)

The views and opinions expressed by the author do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of Peace X Peace.

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2 Comments to ““Heik E7na” (We Are Like This): Some Sketches from My Society”
  1. Dr.Salahideen Alhaj says:

    you were lucky Dima in proposing the process and the issue ,which is very true.
    wish you all the best
    Dr. Salahuddin Al Haj
    PhD IT
    MA Women Studies/WSC /University of Jordan

  2. Dima says:

    thank you very much Dr. Salahideen Alhaj for your comment and for reading my article

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